Nothing New - Rituals

As we’ve been experiencing these turbulent times, I’ve been finding it difficult to carry out my normal rituals some days. A personal injury, an unexpected death, all the news…I just feel a sense of hopelessness, being down and stuck, or being frustrated with all that is beyond my control. And it is those days we need our rituals more than ever. 

Rituals are behaviors we engage in that have personal significance. They can make an ordinary activity more meaningful. Rituals are different than habits. Habits are automatic and often unconscious behaviors. They are “mechanical,” the “what,” whereas rituals are “meaningful,” the “how.” 

Let’s take the morning as an example.

You have a list of things you do: brush teeth, shower, get dressed, and make the bed. It feels good to check them off the list, but there’s not much emotion in the activities. You could switch up the order of completing them, and it wouldn’t make a difference to you. 

Or would it?

How did you feel when you read the sentence about switching up the order?

Okay? Good? Then it is a habit. You’d have a good day despite the different order of events. 

Or did you feel a bit flustered, out of sorts? Then it’s more of a ritual to you. Your day would be thrown off a bit by the changes. 

With rituals, you start to care about how things are done, not just what needs to get done. So now you do care about the order of tasks. 

Habits are good and necessary. You automatically do something. Like every morning I fill up the dog’s dishes with fresh food and water. I don’t need to think about it. It’s an automated activity that doesn’t require much brain power. 

Rituals bring us out of the grind of everyday stuff and provide some life, some animation. 

A final example for today: you’re out with friends and order a drink. Do you just start sipping your beverages? Or do you clink your glasses together and say “cheers?” That’s habit vs. ritual. 

Over the next couple weeks, take time to notice what some of your habits and rituals are. 

We’ll dive deeper in the next Nothing New and see how you can add some ritual to everyday activities to counterbalance all the turbulence in the world.